bright

I tried not to let it get to this point hahh.

tomorrow will be one week since my grandpa died, and monday will be a week since my grnadma died.
I didn't realize until this happened that I have never gone through someone close to me dying. There have been people I've known who have died, but they weren't really close enough to me to effect the way I wake up every morning now.

Funny how I wasn't necessarily the closest to my grandparents.. no reason really, I was just 'busy'.
Being busy always takes up what is more important. I had to punk out on cooking with grandma one night because I had to work.
becauseihadtowork. that poor thing just wanted to spend time with me, and I know I still would've been able to survive if I hadn't worked that night.

I painted Grandma's nails for her before she died on Valentine's Day, so when I heard she was gone I painted my toes the same color hah.

The church has been soooo so good to us. Our phone has been ringing off.the.HOOK, and last night a lady from church brought us a cake hah :)
So many people have been praying for us, and I reallyy truly AM grateful, and have felt how it has kept me strong
but I still just cry. and cry, and cry. on my way to work, and at night, and whenever I try not to think about it.

I know that with a trial comes a blessing, so I'm hanging on to that
and to faith, of course